"Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has yet to come. We have only today. Let us begin."

by Mother Teresa

Just a little over three months ago I felt that time was standing still as I waited for Amalie to be born. I was so excited and so tired of waiting, and I just wanted to whole thing to happen. Now, I feel like time is flying by and I wish I could go back and start all over again so that I could experience this blessing one more time. I never thought I would say that only 3 months later, but yes, I would do it all again tomorrow if that meant I could experience all of the amazing and sweet moments with Amalie again. I feel like it is kind of crazy to already be mourning the fact that my baby is growing up so quickly. But then I guess I am just crazy. 

The past couple of months have been truly amazing. Amalie is developing such a fun and sweet little personality. She loves to socialize and smiles and coos all the time. She is so curious and ever since she gained more control of her neck has been turning her head from one side to the other just to make sure she sees what is going on around her. The result has been that she has a sweet little bald spot on the back of her head. She is great at letting us know when she needs or wants something. Instead of crying she just calls out and waits for an answer, then tries again if we didn't respond. It is amazing to watch her grow and develop from day to day. 

So back to the topic of time. I have always been very conscious about not letting days pass me by. It has really been placed on my heart to enjoy and be thankful for each day. To appreciate the small things in life and to take time to appreciate the beauty in the world. I am well aware of the hurt and pain in the world as well, which makes me want to be even more grateful for the beauty. Since Amalie was born I have started mourning the time that has already gone by. I don't know if this is healthy or normal, but I keep thinking of the time I will have with her before she moves on with her life as an adult. There will be only 18 summers (give and take a few) where she will be my little girl living under my roof. There will be only 18 springs and 18 falls. I want all of those springs, summers, falls and winters to be magical. I want her to feel loved and cherished for all 18 and the rest of her life. I want to show her the beauty in the world and I want to teach her to have empathy for all of the hurts and pains. I want to teach her to find the beauty that resides in every person and I want to show her the love that the Lord has for all of his children. Time will fly by and I want to cherish every moment. I will not succumb to silly daily stresses. I want to live each day with a thankful heart. I want to be spontaneous and give Amalie a magical childhood. 

Although I feel like the past three months have flown by, I have loved every moment. I will actually miss waking up with Amalie in the middle of the night when she starts to sleep through the night. I love those sweet quiet moments at night when she is so calm and snuggly and when she nestles so close into me. I will miss rocking her in my arms when she is fussy. I love those sweet eyes looking up at me and being able to give her all the love I have. I will miss all of the sweet moments with my infant but I am so excited to experience the joys of my baby and then of my toddler. So I am going to cherish each and every day. From the words of Mother Teresa "Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has yet to come. We have only today. Let us begin."

We have had a wonderful Christmas and New Years. It is wonderful when you can find a way to celebrate with all of those fun Christmasy things while appreciating the true meaning of the holiday. This year was just that. We had all of the 'fixins' but we started out the celebrations praying and being thankful for the peace, joy, love and freedom that we have in Jesus. 

To start off December we had an amazing visit with Keith's parents. We relaxed together, celebrated Keith's graduation, made good food, went on walks (despite the cold), enjoyed the winter wonderland that Norway is in December, played with sweet girl, and watched movies together. The 2 weeks flew by and we were so sad to see them go. We then had a sweet Christmas Eve with my family and woke up to find out Naomi was in labor. We then welcomed our precious little girl Eva into the world on the 26th. For New Years Eve we celebrated with a few couples at our sweet friends' Egil and Veronica's house. We are now ready to welcome a new year and all of the adventures that come along with it!

Happy New Year!! Here is a little pic update!

 A picture update

Amalie at 1 month old and on the move!

 A beautiful and cold afternoon walk with the Peavy's ...  and by cold I mean 10 degrees!!

My sweet Amalie makes the funniest faces and smiles all the time now!

All dressed up and super cute before her Daddy's graduation ceremony

She is trying to talk all the time... she makes the cutest noises and copies your mouth movements

Well, she doesn't always smile

Keith and his parents at graduation! He is now a master grad, and graduated at the top of his class!! 

Some of his good friends

Yes, I am tired, but so happy

 Good morning Daddy!

 Cherishing every moment with my Amalie

(pronounced like Amelia, but just switch the E sound with an A like in "ball" or "mall")

(Just so you know, you might notice that my English isn't so good anymore. That is what happens when you live in another country speaking and writing another language all of the time).

It is starting to seem quite pathetic that I can be home full time, and yet have a hard time posting anything. At the same time, there is quite little that I feel bad about these days. It is hard to express how thankful I am to be able to spend this time with Amalie at home without having to worry about anything else. Although I wake up several times a night to feed Amalie, I am never concerned about being tired the next day. The only thing I have to wake up and do is spend more time with her. Of course I try to do other things as well, such as meeting friends and family, keeping the house clean, going for walks, but it is such a blessing to not have to worry about work right now.

I have so much respect for all of those mothers out there who manage to go through this transition while having to work, or those that go back to work only after a few short weeks/months. I know it must be so tough to share your attention when all you want to do is give it to your baby. It must be even more difficult to leave your child in childcare after only a few weeks or months. It is funny because when I try to explain to my friends in Norway how it is back home in the US, they are confused and extremely surprised. At the same time, when I explain to my friends back home what it is like for new mothers here is Norway, they are confused and extremely surprised. Since moving to Norway, I have thought a lot about our natural ability to adapt to our circumstances and our environment. This can be such a gift. Even though a mother in Norway could look at the American system, and vice versa, as completely unnatural and crazy, the mothers and their children make it and do well. That being said, I am extremely thankful for living in Norway right now. I will be home with my sweet baby girl until the summer of 2013 while getting paid 100%, Keith will get 3 months after that with 100% pay, and I will be able to return to my job without any problems. No matter where you stand politically, that is a gift and I will cherish my time with my angel. I love paying taxes when you get to experience the benefits.

I never finished the post about my labor and the first couple of weeks at home. I think I will just share my overall impressions. First and foremost, there is no way to describe the pain associated with contractions, especially since everyone experiences them differently. I would describe them as sharp shooting, electric shock-like, pains in the abdomen, lower back and upper thigh area. They are not in themselves the most painful thing I have ever experienced, but considering that they lasted for 1 minute or more, returning every 3-7 minutes for 36 hours, I will say that all together it was one of the most painful experiences. By the time I was ready to push I was just so physically exhausted that I just felt plain crazy. At that point I wasn't paying attention to anything around me, I was just trying to make it through each contraction. Although I thought that pushing the baby out would be the hardest part, it was not in my circumstance. When it came to that point, it was almost a relief. It might also have to do with the fact that I could finally see the end of the long and hard process. Once Amalie was out, I was surprisingly present and aware. I was so physically and mentally exhausted, but I got such a burst of renewed energy. The whole process is truly a miracle.

Keith and I were watching this comedian (I can't remember his name but it was called Mr. Universe) and he had such a great point. Women grow a baby with their bodies, they deliver the baby with their bodies, and then they feed the baby with their bodies. All the man does is help for 5 seconds doing the one thing that a man thinks about 24 hours a day;) That may not be 100% the case... I mean a man does care for, support and encourage the woman during the pregnancy, birth and feeding. But I will admit that the first week after she was born, I did wonder why men hadn't been created to at least help in the feeding process. The first week after Amalie was born I was so unbelievably tired, sore in my entire body, and to top it all off breastfeeding was terribly painful. All I wanted was to be calm and enjoy feeding her, but I caught myself cringing and tightening all of my muscles every time she ate. The first week was so sweet and wonderful, yet exhausting and tough. Amalie was so tiny and precious and all she did was sleep, eat and poop. We just sat and stared at her almost all day. I did cry a few times, and if you know me well you know that I rarely cry. I cried the first time she cried really hard, and the first time milk came out of her nose and mouth at the same time. I also watched those birth stories and cried every time the baby was put on the mother's chest (yes, I am a weirdo).

The second week was slightly better. But I was still in so much pain in my entire body and I didn't understand why. Well, we found out. I woke up one morning with 103 degree fever. I could barely breath and I fainted. Lets just say it was quite dramatic for Keith. We went to the hospital and found out I had a pretty bad breast infection and I was given intravenous antibiotics overnight. Needless to say, the 3rd week was much better. I started to realize it wasn't normal for your body to be in so much pain, and I started to get used to the lack of sleep. Since that time things really have been just a dream. I am not saying it has always been easy. She has had fussy periods at night, and especially around week 6 she was pretty much crying for 2 hours each night and waking up every 1-2 hours. She must have gone through a growth spurt or something because she has now stopped with her nightly cries and she has been waking up every 3-4 hours, which seems like a full nights sleep to me!!

So now she is almost 8 weeks old, she smiles all the time, she makes the sweetest sounds and she is just plain adorable. He favorite places to be are the changing table and her baby bjorn bouncy chair. She prefers to be in places where she can look around, she loves to look at lights, and she loves to be sung to. When she is awake and not drowsy she is kicking her legs and waving her arms, making it quite difficult to take pictures (but I manage to take quite a few, it is almost embarrassing). When she smiles, she sticks her tongue out. She is especially smiley in the mornings. She is my joy and my passion and I am so thankful to be her Mamma (Norwegian spelling). Here are a few of my favorite pictures from the past couple of weeks.

 Loving her car seat, and loving on her Mamma! Oh, how I love baby snuggles!

Look at that face!!!

 She is such a little snuggle bug! She melts my heart

Beautiful little hands

 I am in heaven!!

 Look at that belly!! And by the way, she prefers to have her right fist in that position for protection, at almost all times;)

 Her sweet Daddy practicing with the bottle. Next week will be my first night away (and by night I mean 1 1/2 hours away for a movie right down the street just in case she needs me)... yes, Twilight!